4Game

I was running around Reserve like the good ratboy I am, finding decent enough loot for my broke ass. With a full pilgrim I ran to pull the lever and to the bunker extract. Once I made it to the bunkers I heard some people around but decided go to the exit anyway. Timer ticked down, people came closer but I remain in place because the timer has 1.5 s remaining. Nothing could get me now.

I hear a dangerous click and dark spec flies behind me. RGD-5. Second one lands right after. Running away at this point resets the timer and I'd need to prone to really survive, leaving me open for a push. I have 3.0 seconds to live. More than enough, I've made tighter extractions. So I sit.

Timer goes to 0.0 and disappears. Soon my screen would darken, I'd wake in my hideout and get to sell my scraps.

The longest second of my life passes. I am more sweaty than a lvl 60 streamer chad with 3 gamerchairs.

The only thing longer than that second was the second following it.

As the explosion rips me 24 new assholes I wonder why I didn't survive. The extractions are usually spot on, what has changed. Then it dawns on me. TODAY IS FRIDAY. Tears run down my cheeks while I hear the laughter of the devs as they roast a sausage on the servers.