Categories: GuidesValheim

Mistlands is dogshit because Valheim’s inherent mechanics are dogshit

Mistlands is cool and all but fuck you if you try to explore. Using the wisp is like roleplaying a legally blind person, you walk 5 steps wait 5 seconds to see what's in front of you, and repeat. The entire terrain is just filled with 90 degree cliff faces and stupid fucking slopes that makes any kind of combat impossible. I'm fighting Seekers and on flatish terrain they are super easy to parry and kill but as soon as you introduce any kind of elevation in this garbage game, your viking is missing every single swing. The bugs are low to the ground so if you have the high ground, you lose. If you have the low ground, you also lose because you can't swing for shit. Not only that, you need to spend stamina jumping up and down the goddamn terrain you won't have stamina to do anything else. "Oh just drink a stamina pot?" Well stfu retard, the stamina pot is only good for regenerating 160 stamina quickly and then going on a 2 minute cooldown. Its fucking worthless if you have to fight more than a couple Seekers.

Here's some feedback to the hack fucking devs that took 2 years to churn out this piece of shit. How about having the stamina bar regenerate PROPORTIONALLY to your total stamina? I shouldn't have my stamina bar of 200 regen at the same rate as a stamina bar of 25. Its fucking pointless having a stamina bar of 200 if the regen rate is the same, you just run into the same situation where JUMPING to navigate the garbage terrain in Pisslands uses whatever you've regenerated. Don't even think about blocking or fighting back, no sir, you'd be lucky to have stamina for two swings.

How about also making the wisp be controllable or shine in a larger radius? I shouldn't need to stop moving every 5 meters to wait for this piece of shit Wisp to show me another 5 meters in front of me.

All these problems end up making Pisslands one of the worst experiences I've had to endure. The plains was fine despite Deathsquitos being able to two shot you or the Goblins being able to kill you if you mess up, at least there I'm able to maneuver around and fight smart. Mistlands is just run around until you find terrain that doesn't fuck you or cause the monsters to be unhittable.

If it took these devs 2 years to come up with this garbage and its really fucking evident they don't play their own game, I'm scared to see how they fuck up the other zones. 2 years to release what some other devs take to go from EA to Full release. I'd be happier if they just rug-pulled me, took all the money and cancelled support for the game, at least then I wouldn't get pissed off by whatever garbage they churn out next.

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