My OCD with having good stats is ruining my enjoyment of the game – any tips?

I'm by no means a good player, but my last 1000 battles I have over 2000 wn8 and a 55% win ratio. However, I'm so obssessed with seeing relatively impressive numbers on xvm that it literally stops me from playing the game, in fear that I'll fuck up and play badly or I'll have loads of bad games and ruin the stats.

I have countless premium tanks in my garage that are unplayed because my OCD is terrified of bad numbers. I have, for example, the M-IV-Y from the loot boxes. I want to play it so badly but I'm hesitating in fear that I'll play it awfully and leave the battle with 400 damage and 100 WN8. And then I'll play the next game in it and do even worse. And after that, I'll be playing the tank as a chore in order to get the stats to an optimal or acceptable level. It's absolutely pathetic, I know, but it's driving me insane.

If anyone else has ever gone through a similar issue, please let me know how you dealt with it!