Panther 2 wanted to see if im the only one that experienced this

so i spent gold on the game for the first time always been premium but just worked a couple hours over time at work b.c that was more fun than playing the panther 2 with the 7.5 gun from last tank and than i get the turret and tracks only took an extra 2 hours at work w.e much more enjoyable than playing the tank and lately ive been palyign it and even with the 8.8 i feel like a useless member of my team im not to great of a player 55% win rate but i keep on having the urge to just exit to garage while playing this tank b.c im having no fun should i gvie up on grinding the e50 or just work a couple more hours overtime and play tanks i like or am i playing this tank wrong skill4u says it and the chinese mediujm are the worst two tier 8 tanks but im not sure if thats just a cope by me and its actually meta. I used to play t4 light tanks back when 6 tier spread in xbox days but now i cant deal with this on pc least fun ive had playing this game.
I treid playing it as a sniper but as thier are not many long range sniper maps ansd i feel liek the strv preformes better as a sniper or anything with cammo or anything with armor so i tried playing it as a medium tank but i hit the issue of i cant pen the turrets of other mediums to consitantly and they can pen me 1`00% of the time and have mroe alpha or an auto loader and obvioulsy i cant play it as a heavy tank or scout as it has some awfull armor and is a huge barn with no cammo so im not sure what role i shou ld play this in or if i should just accept its bad at almost everything had the day off of work today b.c weird schedual and for the first ime in like 50k games across pc and xbox i drowned myself (on purpose) ive done it on accednt when i got shot b.c i was like whelp nothing i can do and i dont wana give enmy free silver shooting my shitbarn and hit a realazation that i am having no fun for the first time in wot is thier a way to play this tank and ahve fun or should i just move on give up on the e50 or should i work a few extra hours this next week and just buy the 7 ish k gold to skip this tank i have grinded to tier 10 on the maus line twice jgpz e100 twice and sevral other tanks and always had fun over the years but this is the first time im feeling like this am i just a whiner or did anyone else have this experience
i always start out every game by saying glhf and try and be a postive influnce on my team but i really dont like how ive been getting mad playing this tank never raged in chat but its frustrating and i dont like how im behaving as a result of it