“This was the outcome this time… it’s just the way it is.” -Wraith

Hello /r/ApexLegends,

I've made a personal discovery lately due to Apex Legends and I'd like to share my story in hopes that it helps at least one of you. This may not make sense to those who haven't gone through it, so let's start with an evaluation to see if this may impact you:

  • Have you had anxiety or experienced a "fear of missing out" on rare / time limited items in games like Apex Legends?

  • Have you felt the need to collect "everything" in games, or "all the cool items" for one or more character?

  • Have you spent money that you knew you shouldn't of on these sort of items or have you felt guilty / bad when you've spent money on these games?

  • Have you had an argument with someone else over your spending habits involving these sort of items or felt the need to lie to others about your spending?

If you answered yes to one or more of these questions, you may be exhibiting signs that can be tied to an addictive personality and should probably continue on with this post. Otherwise, this post probably won't be of much value to you outside of getting a look into what others go through and how to possibly help them.

Now that we've established that you may have an addictive personality on some level, let's tally up the impact. Start by adding up how much you've spent on Apex Legends (or the game that applies to you). Once you've done that, compare it to your other expenses (entertainment, food, housing, other life needs, etc). Does the amount you've spent on this game seem reasonable in comparison? Does the spending fit in your budget or is it adding a strain? If things don't "add up", you should consider "breaking the cycle".

In my case, I've spent at least $250 – $300 on Apex Legends (USD). I bought both battle passes and way too many "loot ticks". I could afford it, but I felt really wrong about it when I did my own personal evaluation. Looking back on it, it was easy to do since I spread it out. I'd open a loot tick here and there until I ran out of coins, then I'd buy more coins and do it again and again over multiple nights. Doing this would give me a moment of joy when I got something "cool", but most of the time it was met with feelings of regret and I'd reason that I should try again to get that joy again. From my understanding, this is a common cycle found in addicts.

I recently discovered I had this issue and made growth due to the "Iron Crown Collection" event. I desperately wanted everything, but I just couldn't justify the pricing. Luckily, the pricing and accompanying community outrage caused me to evaluate my own personal spending and to take a stand. I purposefully decided to spend NOTHING on this event. It was a struggle at times and I felt anxious about it the entire time the event ran, but I was going to make a point both to myself and those marketing these items.

As a result of me not spending anything and only redeeming the "free" items, I "broke the cycle" of spending and felt relief once the event ended. Now, despite Wraith being my main, I don't feel the need to buy the new "limited time" event skin. I can't claim to understand the why, but I don't feel nearly as anxious about "missing out" on these limited time items now. I'm sure a psychologist could explain the why / how better (and I hope they do!), but all I can say is that I feel immensely less stressed / anxious about Apex Legends and the "need to collect all the cool items" in the game. If you're going through something similiar, I'd recommend you try "breaking the cycle" yourself by abstaining from purchasing or completely dropping the game for a time. You'll likely find yourself feeling a lot better in the long run.

Personally, I plan on continuing to buy each battle pass each season because I still enjoy playing the game and supporting the devs. With that being said, I will not make purchases outside of the Battle Passes in the future. I don't want to fall into that cycle again of purchasing items with the hope of getting joy out of it. There is always the chance of "relapse", so everyone should try to be aware of their limits.

NOTE: If you feel like saying something negative here, please take it elsewhere. I take full responsibility for my actions and this isn't a pity party. The point of this post is to help others that may be blind to their own actions as I was. If your reaction to this is negative then I recommend you evaluate your own life choices and output into the world. You can do better. As Wraith would say, "We all make choices in our lives, every second, everyday, and those choices they define us, but they don't control us. We are our future, not our past. No matter what choice you make, the world you're in is the world you chose… Accept it."

Source: https://www.reddit.com/r/apexlegends/comments/d06x62/this_was_the_outcome_this_time_its_just_the_way/

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